FUNNY animals

Si acum sa ne amuzam putin cu niste fotografii dragute!

Acestea reprezinta doar o mica parte din colectia mea! De fiecare data cand le privesc, imi apare zambetul

De fapt, asta este si intentia, sa va fac si pe voi sa radeti cu mine! Haideti sa promovam zambetul in fiecare zi!

Ati vazut cum este cand cineva va zambeste dragut la un ghiseu? Sau va ajuta politicos cu informatiile de care aveti nevoie?

Cu siguranta va binedispune si va infrumuseteaza ziua!

Click pe poza pentru marire

Voua care va place mai mult??

Bancuri cu&despre faimoasele BLONDE :)

Doamne fereste, sa nu se inteleaga ca am ceva cu doamnele sau domnisoarele blonde. Sunt si eu blonda, stiu cum e sa se faca glume pe seama noastra, insa dincolo de toate micile rautati, cred ca e amuzant sa primim o asa  atentie deosebita din partea sexului opus. Chiar si cele mai “picante” bancuri cu blonde devin simpatice la un moment dat!

*

“Doua blonde calatoresc cu trenul.
In compartiment calatoreste cu ele un barbat mai in varsta, cu barba.
Sopteste una la alta:
- Uita-te! Asta-i Mircea cel Batran…
- Esti proasta. El e mort de vreo 6-700 de ani.
In acel moment intra un alt barbat in compartiment, si-l saluta pe barbos:
- Ciao, Mircea, ce faci, batrine! nu te-am mai vazut de sute de ani….
Prima blonda:
- Na, cine-i proasta?”

*

“O tipa blonda, superba, la volanul unei masini si mai superbe, opreste la semafor. Apare “aurolacul” de zona si-i cere o tigara. Blonda i-o ofera imediat ca sa scape de el. Intre timp, se pune de verde si tipa pleaca in tromba. La urmatorul semafor, in mod ciudat, acelasi individ:
- Doamna, da-mi si un foc.
Tipa ii da bricheta cu totul, ca sa-l vada plecat de langa portiera si porneste mai departe. La al treilea semafor, acelasi individ (spre exasperarea blondei):
- Doamna, ai fost o dama buna cu mine asa ca, daca-mi dai 1 leu, te invat sa iesi din girator!”

*

“Patru prietene tinere si frumoase si-au petrecut concediul impreuna la mare, fara barbatii lor.
La intoarcere, pe satena au apucat-o remuscarile:
- Fetelor, am sa-i povestesc barbatului meu de cate ori l-am inselat in concediu.
Bruneta: – Ce idioata!
Roscata: – Ce curajoasa!
Blonda: – Ce memorie!”

*

“Suna blonda la politie:
-Alo, mi-au spart masina, mi-au furat tot…volan, pedale si schimbatorul de viteze, tot!!!”
Peste 5 minute, isi da cu palma peste frunte si suna iar la politie:
-Alo, va rog frumos sa ma scuzati, m-am urcat in spate! ”

*

“Mama are trei fiice si le marita pe rand. Apoi le scrie si le intreaba cum se inteleg cu sotul. Prima zice: Bergenbier. Mama nu intelege la ce se referadar apoi vede reclama la TV: satisfactie pana la ultima picatura .Mama se linisteste, fiica e ok..A doua fata raspunde tot codat: Kent. Mama nu intelege dar vede reclama cu “ultra long, ultra strong ” si se linisteste A treia fata scrie: British Airlines .Mama se uita la TV sa vada reclama… si cand o vede, lesina: 7 zile din 7, de trei ori pe zi, in toate directiile.”

*

“Intr-o noapte, la spital, o asistenta blonda il scoala pe pacientul care dormea un somn adanc si ii spune:
- Treziti-va, am uitat sa va dau somniferul!”

*

“Un tip incercand sa agate o blonda:
- Domnisoara, nu cumva ne-am vazut ieri la gradina zoologica?
- Parca da, in ce cusca erati?”

*

“Suna blonda la CFR:

-Imi spuneti va rog cat face trenul din Tg.Mures pana in Bucuresti?
-O secunda…
-Multumesc!! ”

*

“O blonda isi cumpara un Porsche ultimul tip, rosu, fumos foc. Pe drum i se strica masina si, ca orice sofer, deschide capota si vede ca nu mai are motor. Speriata, nu stie ce sa faca, dar cand colo opreste alt Porsche rosu, alta blonda. Intreaba:
- Ce ai patit?
- Nu stiu, cred ca mi-am pierdut motorul pe drum..
- Nu-ti face griji, ca am eu unul de rezerva in portbagaj.”

*

“Trei blonde intra intr-un bar. Sunt fericite, danseaza si canta. Comanda fiecare cate ceva de baut.
Barmanul, pana la urma, le intreaba ce sarbatoresc. Una dintre ele ii explica:
- Tocmai am terminat un puzzle si ne-a luat numai 3 luni sa terminam.
- Si ? Intreba barmanul.
- Pe cutie scria 2-4 ani !”

*

“De ce atunci cand o blonda se spala pe cap face ture in jurul dusului?
Pentru ca pe sampon scrie WASH AND GO!”

*

“La etajul 60, intr-un zgirie nori: un Irlandez, un Mexican si un Blond. Ora prinzului. Irlandezul se uita in pachet:
- Iar friptura rece? Daca mai gasesc o data asta, ma arunc de aici!
Mexicanul se uita in pachet:
- Iar turta de porumb? Daca mai gasesc o data asta, ma arunc de aici!
Blondul se uita in pachet:
- Iar sandwich de parizer? Daca mai gasesc o data asta, ma arunc de aici!
A doua zi, la ora mesei; Irlandezul deschide cutia, se uita:
-Nu-mi vine sa cred! Iar friptura rece!? Si se arunca jos de la etajul 60.
Mexicanul deschide cutia, se uita:
-Nu-mi vine sa cred! Iar turta de porumb!?  Si se arunca jos de la etajul 60.
Blondul deschide cutia, se uita:
-Nu-mi vine sa cred! Iar sandwich de parizer!?  Si se arunca jos de la etajul 60.
Dupa trei zile, la inmormintare, vaduva Irlandeza si cea Mexicana plang pe rupte ca n-au stiut sa prepare pachetul barbatilor. Vaduva Blondului le zice:
- Ce va uitati asa? Blondul isi prepara singur pachetul!”

Zicale si citate celebre

Albert Einstein

• “Imagination is more important than knowledge.”
• “Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.”
• “I want to know God’s thoughts; the rest are details.”
• “The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.”
• “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”
• “The only real valuable thing is intuition.”
• “A person starts to live when he can live outside himself.”
• “I am convinced that He (God) does not play dice.”
• “God is subtle but he is not malicious.”
• “Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character.”
• “I never think of the future. It comes soon enough.”
• “The eternal mystery of the world is its comprehensibility.”
• “Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing.”
• “Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind.”
• “Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.”
• “Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds.”
• “Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.”
• “Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one’s living at it.”
• “The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.”
• “God does not care about our mathematical difficulties. He integrates empirically.”
• “The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking.”
• “Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding.”
• “Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school.”
• “The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.”
• “If A is a success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut.”
• “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the the universe.”
• “As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality.”
• “Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.”
• “I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.”
• “In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep.”
• “The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there’s no risk of accident for someone who’s dead.”
• “Too many of us look upon Americans as dollar chasers. This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated thoughtlessly by the Americans themselves.”
• “Heroism on command, senseless violence, and all the loathsome nonsense that goes by the name of patriotism — how passionately I hate them!”
• “No, this trick won’t work…How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?”
• “My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.”
• “Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence.”
• “The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.”
• “The further the spiritual evolution of mankind advances, the more certain it seems to me that the path to genuine religiosity does not lie through the fear of life, and the fear of death, and blind faith, but through striving after rational knowledge.”
• “You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.”
• “One had to cram all this stuff into one’s mind for the examinations, whether one liked it or not. This coercion had such a deterring effect on me that, after I had passed the final examination, I found the consideration of any scientific problems distasteful to me for an entire year.”
• “…one of the strongest motives that lead men to art and science is escape from everyday life with its painful crudity and hopeless dreariness, from the fetters of one’s own ever-shifting desires. A finely tempered nature longs to escape from the personal life into the world of objective perception and thought.”
• “He who joyfully marches to music rank and file, has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action. It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder.”
• “Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts.” (Sign hanging in Einstein’s office at Princeton)

Zicalele au fost adunate de Kevin Harris in anul 1995 iar lista a circulat pe internet, prin e-mail, o perioada buna de timp.